Boring Springs Saloon

The Saloon is located on the Main Thoroughfare of The Town of Boring Springs.

Items

 * A hat from the Hats box by the bar, either a four-gallon hat‎, barely-enchanted hat, or a floppy derby, depending on whether you are a Cow Puncher, Beanslinger, or Snake Oiler.
 * A nasty ring, in the spittoon in the bar.
 * A can of weak fungicide, from the bartender, if you agree to kill the goblin in the basement.


 * A bottle of "Nurse" brand whiskey in the basement.
 * A copy of Boring Springs Gazette Apr. 20 1895 in the basement.

NPCs

 * Crazy Pete
 * Susie Cochrane
 * Gary the Goblin

Quests

 * Return the lost mugs to the bartender for 25 Meat each.
 * Deal with the goblin.
 * Kill the goblin in the saloon basement for 200 Meat and 3 xp.
 * Alternatively, acquire Goblintongue and talk to Gary. You will be unable to complete the quest for the bartender but can take him with you when you leave town.
 * Recover Susie's Rifle
 * Talk to the bartender, then talk to Susie Cochrane at the bar. Visit the Boring Springs Boneyard then ask her about the grave to unlock The Cochrane Ranch.
 * Visit the ranch and fight the Pyrobove in the basement to get to the safe. Take Susie's rifle back to her.

Meat

 * 7 meat from trading a shiny rock to Crazy Pete in the bar.
 * 73 meat from trading an unrefined Meat nugget to Crazy Pete in the bar, and unlocks the Hard hat in the mine.

Mad Libs
Talking to Crazy Pete give a different response each time. For example, Ding-dangit, there's a varmint in my biscuit-barrel!
 * {| class="wikitable mw-collapsible" style="width:90%;"

! Bucket ! Formula
 * Phrase
 * [DARN] machines, can't trust em no more'n a [DARN] [SCOUNDREL].
 * I been minin' these mountains longer'n a [DARN] [HUSTLER] can [CRAZY ACTION]!
 * [SALUTATION], some [DARN] [SCOUNDREL] [HURT ME]!
 * [SALUTATION], there's a [CREATURE] in my [POSSESSIONS]!
 * [CRAZY ACTION]
 * bark at the moon!
 * count the stars!
 * dance a hornpipe!
 * remember momma!
 * scream the solo!
 * take a message!
 * touch the mustard!
 * [CREATURE]
 * centipede
 * ghost
 * goblin
 * hole
 * horn-toad
 * leprechaun
 * rock
 * spider
 * varmint
 * [DARN]
 * Bald-headed
 * Blasted
 * Boondoggled
 * Claim-jumpin'
 * Cotton-pickin'
 * Dag-nabbed
 * Dagnab
 * Dern
 * Dirty
 * Dirty-dealin'
 * Double-crossin'
 * Fork-tongued
 * Four-flushing
 * Frog-toed
 * Furshlugginer
 * Goldang
 * High-heeled
 * Hob-nailed
 * Jim-jammed
 * Left-handed
 * Lily-livered
 * Metal
 * No-good
 * Razza-frazzin'
 * Sidewindin'
 * Slam-jammered
 * Stickle-backed
 * Thistle-whiskered
 * Yella-bellied
 * [HUSTLER]
 * bustle hustler
 * hop-frog
 * mule
 * raccoon
 * rock skunk
 * saloon Jimmy
 * sandpiper
 * shuffle munchkin
 * widow
 * [HURT ME]
 * bit my beard!
 * drank my whiskey!
 * drew a mustache on my mule!
 * grizzled my frizzle-frazzle!
 * jumped my claim!
 * punched me in the onions!
 * sank my battleship!
 * sapped my flapjack!
 * stole my pickaxe!
 * [POSSESSIONS]
 * backpack
 * bedroll
 * biscuit-barrel
 * boot
 * chaps
 * saddlebag
 * sleepin' hole
 * tent
 * whiskey
 * [SALUTATION]
 * By ginger
 * Consarnit
 * Dadgummit
 * Dagnabbit
 * Ding-dangit
 * Gadzooks
 * Godfrey Daniels
 * Horsefeathers
 * Tarnation
 * Thunderation
 * [SCOUNDREL]
 * claim-jumper
 * goblin
 * hornswoggler
 * horse-thief
 * machine
 * rattlesnake
 * scab-shangle
 * scallywag
 * sidewinder
 * snake
 * so-an'-so
 * }
 * Horsefeathers
 * Tarnation
 * Thunderation
 * [SCOUNDREL]
 * claim-jumper
 * goblin
 * hornswoggler
 * horse-thief
 * machine
 * rattlesnake
 * scab-shangle
 * scallywag
 * sidewinder
 * snake
 * so-an'-so
 * }
 * so-an'-so
 * }